for Brova & his mother

Mary's Song at the Cross

I am Miriam
my name means bitterness
and I will mourn
mourn and not be comforted
for the Lord God has dealt bitterly
with his handmaiden

Once I said yes
be it unto me according to your will
I am Miriam
my name means rebellion
and now I say no
the holy one will not win
what the holy one wills
he shall not have

For I am am the mother
and I say my son shall sleep
sleep in my womb
sleep until he rises
rises with the sun

I am Miriam
my name means bitter rebellion
the angels are round about me
And you shall not have him
terrible one, you shall not
you shall not have
my son.

Brova was his mother's only child, a son, and she was a single mother. She lived for him. She saw him into his early manhood - and he was precious.

Brova worked as an intern at the company where I am an admin. He was bright, funny, and kind. He left to study civil engineering at one of the top programs in the country. All of us who worked with him liked him, laughed with him, and wished him well. We knew success was his.

Brova died last weekend in a swimming accident. It doesn't make sense to anyone who knew him. It doesn't make sense to any mother who loves her son. It certainly doesn't make any sense to me. I resist it, and deny it, and refuse it.

This quote is posted in memory of Brova, in sympathy with his mother, and in defense of my own jealous love for my son.

Mary's Song taken from Elizabeth Cunningham. The Passion of Mary Magdalene. Rhinebeck, NY: Monkfish Book Publishing Company. 2006.