tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67825816791730218792024-03-14T08:00:05.964-07:00Jenni's Commonplacea collection of my favorite quotes & the significance they hold for meJennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-76223879694050880712013-07-11T08:03:00.001-07:002013-07-11T08:03:22.093-07:00good company<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQZCS4KLpT6DkDd-xxUC4mvcNPypmqyDG8fUqUGlzN1RPInLD6xopnduzmj7P95Y8r_4JFn2gYysFx4Qocr3MtnjU-GQqRpCm_EmP6PHCJotZgQrPVNIEElaLWGt2TH4iQwseDYvab9wEv/s1600/images.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQZCS4KLpT6DkDd-xxUC4mvcNPypmqyDG8fUqUGlzN1RPInLD6xopnduzmj7P95Y8r_4JFn2gYysFx4Qocr3MtnjU-GQqRpCm_EmP6PHCJotZgQrPVNIEElaLWGt2TH4iQwseDYvab9wEv/s1600/images.jpeg" /></a></div>
<div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-1932479922824589502" itemprop="description articleBody" style="color: #333333; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 1.4; position: relative; width: 666px;">
I'm a newcomer to Glennon Doyle Melton and her blog <a href="http://momastery.com/blog/" style="color: #7ebb00; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Momastery</a>. A friend on Facebook shared one of her blog posts and it resonated for me. Her book,<i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1451697244/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_1?pf_rd_p=1535523722&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=B008J4GRTM&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=0JF4P8EX78DX30VF2E8F" style="color: #7ebb00; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Carry On, Warrior</a></i>, is essentially a collection from the blog, with a few new pieces added as well. I expect it's a great place to start catching up on who Glennon is and what Momastery is all about.<br /><br />I'm about 60 pages in (288 pages total) and here's what stays with me - Glennon is good company for this work of family and life. I'm not certain that a book is the best medium for her style of writing but her perspective, humor, and faith are welcomed. Her commitment to being open and kind encourages me, nudges me, to be live an open and kind life too. She holds a Christian faith that allows for her own discernment and discovery. She seems not to be solely bound to the rules and mores of religious authority. I appreciate that.<br /><br />This is probably my favorite quote from the book:<br /><blockquote class="tr_bq">
I learned that in these disasters, all we can do is tell our In Case of Emergencies that their grief is real, and if it lasts forever, then we will grieve with them forever.<br />As far as I was able to tell during those two years, there was nothing else worth saying. It was not going to be all right, ever. Everything doesn’t happen for a decent reason. I was Sister’s In Case of Emergency and I couldn’t fix her emergency. I couldn’t do anything at all except feed her, hold her when she cried, pray angry prayers, keep showing up, and hope that time and my home and presence would offer healing.</blockquote>
<div>
I learned the truth of this approach to grief & comfort in the early days (years?) grieving the loss of my father. I was comforted most by the friends who came over to just be with us. And those well intended platitudes about the better place that dad was in or that it all happens for a reason just landed clanking and empty in my ears and on my heart. I remember in particular that my beloved Miss G was able to fly home from college for a few days and hang out with our family. We did ordinary things, like clean the kitchen from all the food that people kept bringing us. We did these things together, in good company.<br /><br />In the years since dad's passing, I've been near for other friends and their grief. I hope that I've practiced what I've felt to be true. I hope that I've given more time to showing up, bearing witness, living as good company, and grieving with them than the other things.<br /><br />Life offers, holds, brings, is, a lot of grief. Both from the blatant disasters and the subtle disintegrations. I'm still grieving the birth of a child I didn't plan on, even though he's become the son I love dearly and fiercely. I'm grieving all the advantages and opportunities that I've thrown away. I'm grieving the independence I had a single child-free woman. I grieve lost friendships and old lovers. I think the same kinds of comfort apply to all of these kinds of grief. It's the comfort of time and good company of friends who are just with us through it, who just keep showing up with us.<br /><br />These days of job and motherhood are often lonely for me. It's difficult to coordinate schedules to see people, once I get beyond the difficulty of reaching out in the first place. So I sometimes grieve alone, which feels incomplete somehow, like maybe grief needs a witness to be truly met and healed. Sometimes I stuff the grief or put it on hold. And sometimes I find comfort in a book that comes alongside me like a friend would and says, "Yeah, me too." For me, <i>Carry On, Warrior</i> is one of those books. </div>
<div style="clear: both;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="post-footer" style="background-color: #eeeeee; border-bottom-color: rgb(238, 238, 238); border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-width: 1px; color: #5421bb; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 11px; line-height: 1.6; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: -2px; margin-right: -2px; margin-top: 20px; padding-bottom: 5px; padding-left: 10px; padding-right: 10px; padding-top: 5px;">
</div>
Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-89639426361595172142013-04-27T13:06:00.000-07:002013-04-27T13:06:43.681-07:00TAZ<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNTf8H5H8BPyhVV7JqZV4DsdNEIAlyzxs7jL0M0IWvmuf4j92yrmCp_qcUFvOqqEQMY4i0Xg76m65CJEMT1b4lqurt-bnHO3cuYWX2wJWY5OzVB1Ms5Eb4c-cRt3Ykw9hsTKzRkoiA1nzH/s1600/images.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; color: #88bb21; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-decoration: none;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNTf8H5H8BPyhVV7JqZV4DsdNEIAlyzxs7jL0M0IWvmuf4j92yrmCp_qcUFvOqqEQMY4i0Xg76m65CJEMT1b4lqurt-bnHO3cuYWX2wJWY5OzVB1Ms5Eb4c-cRt3Ykw9hsTKzRkoiA1nzH/s1600/images.jpeg" style="-webkit-box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0976563) 1px 1px 5px; background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: white; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; border-bottom-color: rgb(238, 238, 238); border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-width: 1px; border-color: initial; border-left-color: rgb(238, 238, 238); border-left-style: solid; border-left-width: 1px; border-right-color: rgb(238, 238, 238); border-right-style: solid; border-right-width: 1px; border-top-color: rgb(238, 238, 238); border-top-style: solid; border-top-width: 1px; border-width: initial; box-shadow: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.0976563) 1px 1px 5px; padding-bottom: 5px; padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 5px; padding-top: 5px; position: relative;" /></a></div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">In my small group at</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://www.woodlandparkumc.org/" style="color: #88bb21; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">WPUMC</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">we're reading Brian McLaren's</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Naked-Spirituality-Life-Simple-Words/dp/0061854026" style="color: #88bb21; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Naked Spirituality: A Life WIth God In 12 Simple Words</a></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">. It introduced me to the concept of a Temporary Autonomous Zone (TAZ).</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">"...rigid conformity and emotional inhibition stultify the human spirit, and so occasionally people defy the authorities and dare to dance. They create what author Kester Brewin describes as Temporary Autonomous Zones (TAZs), places where the normal patterns of hegemony and homogeneity are broken."</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">This is taken from page 65, quoting Barbara Ehrenreich, and citing examples like Woodstock, Burning Man, Mardi Gras. These events, at their best are about jubilation, freedom, and connection. He continues on page 67.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">"Could it be that the kingdom of God is the ultimate TAZ, the ultimate liberation from the normal oppressive patterns of hegemony and homogeneity."</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">When I was single and child free it was a lot easier for me to resent and resist hegemony and homogeneity. Certainly they were always there, but I did feel freer to choose people, interests, and expression that were outside the norm. I didn't dream of marriage, family, and home ownership. I dreamt of living purposefully, finding a way to make a difference, to be my own, and to be different.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">That desire was part of why I chose the graduate school and program that I did. Whole Systems Design (WSD) at an alternative university. My dream took the shape of wanting to write, specifically articles about good news, and then maybe start my own program focused on that kind of story. Producing the stories. Training people to seek, articulate, and promote good news. But WSD didn't work that way for me. It focused on talking and small groups. Not my areas of professional interest. Worse, to me, it didn't help equip me to navigate or talk back to the "real world" of hegemony and homogeneity. I graduated more adrift and vulnerable than I started.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Reentering the "real world" I married my grad school honey, started an interim job, and suddenly fell pregnant. Six years later I'm still at the job working as the sole provider for my little family. I feel trapped in the hegemony and homogeneity of job, home, and child rearing. Any little gap for autonomy is savored, celebrated, and jealously guarded.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">These days I find my Temporary Autonomous Zones in my small groups (ironically enough given the grad school debacle), both the Christian group and the Pagan group. Granted, we are not dismantling patriarchy or otherwise disrupting the status quo in publicly recognizable ways. But we are peeling away our conformity and inhibition to unveil to ourselves and these trusted friends our thoughts, feelings, and private realities. And in Pagan ritual we even "dare to dance."</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Today it is easy for me to accept grace as the thing that pierces hegemony and homogeneity and frees us to be authentic souls liberated from the rules that stultify human life. This definition holds true to the example of Jesus's life - practicing a life of loving others that put him outside the rules and mores of the law and the culture of his time. He stands as the model of how Christians too ought to live lives of love, lives changed by that grace. I experience this kind of grace in the Pagan rituals as we minister to each other in ceremony, raise energy together, and "party like Pagans."</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">But it's challenging me and yet I'm hungry for it, to have this grace in the rest of my life in the "real world." (I guess that's why they're "temporary" autonomous zones.) How do I live a daily life of such grace, outside the bounds of hegemony and homogeneity? Is it just part of being fully human that we develop and abide by these conventions? To live in this world, a soul and a body, means we entangle ourselves in these invisible, powerful things. And it's a life of spirituality, of practice and of hunger, that manifests the desire for grace and the means to be grace to ourselves and others.</span>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-8380364199386042372013-04-08T09:51:00.004-07:002013-04-08T09:52:30.593-07:00consciousness & culture<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMndXh2OS9uUC-RQhsFHdZ-mm8OMX6pUcNmimEUzmdE9Cw2W99anVlDkOFMGjjCLsLGUhXacnAQZnmsIUf0mi5e-9Ck1W35eUh6uOzLhw0IdJzVT_TxMAQYLJW3PVDvt4OGo3EBy7JGNfr/s1600/spiral.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMndXh2OS9uUC-RQhsFHdZ-mm8OMX6pUcNmimEUzmdE9Cw2W99anVlDkOFMGjjCLsLGUhXacnAQZnmsIUf0mi5e-9Ck1W35eUh6uOzLhw0IdJzVT_TxMAQYLJW3PVDvt4OGo3EBy7JGNfr/s1600/spiral.gif" /></a></div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I'm rereading Starhawk's</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Spiral-Dance-Rebirth-Religion/dp/B001J723BW/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1365430829&sr=8-3&keywords=spiral+dance" style="color: #88bb21; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">Spiral Dance: A Rebirth of the Ancient Religion of the Great Goddess</a></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">for the first time in about 15 years. The pagan group I do holiday rituals with has added a book club to its activities and I'm excited to have more time with these good folks and to dig into some good books together.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Starting with the Introduction of this book I'm struck by how many of the same words and phrases are standing out to me now as when I first read, and underlined, the book. The ideas that held my attention then also speak to my life today. Maybe it's something about phases of transition in my life. Or maybe it's a testimony to my years long search for meaning.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">"The concept of a religion that worshipped a Goddess was amazing and empowering." p.2</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">"Now my body, in all its femaleness, its breasts, vulva, womb, and menstrual flow, was sacred." p.2</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">"Maybe, in fact, deep transformation of society could only come from an underlying transformation of culture." p.6</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">"To create the changes in consciousness needed to transform society at a deep level, we need insights broader than those the issues of the moment can provide." p.7</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Although, thinking about it a little further now, it's almost ironic that the same material has got my attention because I'm approaching it from such a different place. Fifteen years ago I was struggling with the evangelical tradition. I was specifically addressing the roles and possibilities for women in that culture. Today I've found a Christian church led by a woman and where women and men share visible and diverse roles. I'm less concerned now about changing culture and more concerned about changing my own mind, my heart, my life.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I can hear my psychiatrist telling me to "go inside" and I suspect that she would tell me that meaning won't be found in a book or a book club. But maybe this book, with its affirmation of the sacredness of life and the immanence of the divine, with its rituals and exercises, may offer a way inside. And maybe this book club, with its good company of smart, caring, spiritual women, may form a container of kind support as I make the journey inward.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">The book isn't just a 'How To Worship the Great Goddess" guidebook. It's also an invitation to create religion, to change consciousness, and to change culture. These are big things. And in small ways I'm already part of them. Our little group of pagan friends creates ritual together 8 times a year. Together, through ritual and socializing we create a little pocket of culture where things are a little different from the mainstream. From that secure space we walk back into our daily lives, and hopefully bring some aspects of it with us. Nothing too radical. But still something very real and special in our lives. And I suppose that's where change, for a person or a group or a society, begins.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #666666; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', Trebuchet, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-3194894911229473592009-06-13T19:45:00.000-07:002009-06-13T19:47:36.751-07:00commonplacing: yeast & the feast<span><span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;">"The Kingdom of Heaven is like yeast," we heard him say, "that a woman took and mixed with three measures of flour until all of it was leavened."<br />Judith put her hands to her mouth and actually giggled.<br />"What's so funny?" I wondered.<br />"Don't you know, Mary? The rabbis consider yeast unclean. Only women handle it. Who but our Jesus would dare to compare it to the Kingdom of God!"<br />Many times I witnessed the gap-toothed grins of old women, and the clapping and dancing of younger ones as they recognized themselves and their lives in the stories: the persistent widow demanding justice, the woman throwing a party when she finds the lost coin. They needed no explanation. They understood: the Bridegroom was here in their midst. They were invited to the feast."</span> pp 414-415<br /><br />First, the obvious things that I like about this passage:<br />1) Jesus speaks directly to women's lives - rather than overlooking us or lumping us into stories where men are normative & primary.<br />2) Jesus says and does the things that are vitally different from the conventions of his time & place and through that conveys the heart of his message.<br />3) Jesus used stories about people's real lives to share that message and to welcome & cultivate a community who got the message.<br /><br />Now, maybe more subtly, how this passage applies to me.<br /><br />In the last few weeks, my little family took a pause from our church attendance. We need more time as a family, interacting with each other, doing fun stuff, chatting, chasing & getting chased by Baby N.... When we go to church we feel like we give the best hours of the day (before N's nap) to an event that doesn't give us much room to interact with each other. It felt like a loss. Plus, I tend to come home all riled up.<br /><br />But in the course of Sunday night's June moon ritual, something came to me. I need to go back to church:<br />1) Because it's good for me to hear other people's ideas about Christianity. Some of the folks in this congregation have powerful love and commitment to Jesus. They tell stories of their experiences of the presence of Christ in their lives.<br />2) Because I want to do good work in my community and this church does that all day, every day. They are sharing "the feast" in tangible ways (rent, food, recovery groups, access to medical care...). I will be a lot more effective as part of this community than I will be on my own.<br />3) It's good for me to get riled up. Maybe not every Sunday, & certainly not to the point where I get bitter & dried up, but enough to point me to something vitally different as illuminated by Jesus & to prompt me in how I'm going to live that.<br />4) [bonus!] This is a congregation of quirky loving folks that I enjoy. They love my son. They welcomed my family from minute 1. (They shared "the feast" even with us?) Churches like this are rare. People like this are to be held onto.<br /><br />So, this Sunday, Baby N and I will be heading around the corner to church. Instead of family time, L will get a morning to himself - to play bass or read philosophy or take a long bath. All the good refreshing restorative things that a stay-at-home parent rarely gets to do for himself. And we'll work it out, like all families do. We'll keep moving so that each of us is growing and challenged, nurtured and celebrated. And I hope we'll bring a little bit more into our time together from this kind of time apart.<br /><br />Cunningham, Elizabeth. The Passion of Mary Magdalen. New York: Monkfish. 2006.</span></span>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-62210811682090838032009-05-17T22:01:00.001-07:002009-05-17T23:08:52.067-07:00chosen, befriended & blessed"What does it mean to be chosen by God?"<br /><br />The question derived from today's Gospel reading - a passage about being chosen by God and now being a friend of Christ, rather than a servant. Pastor J posed it to the congregation and then gave us five minutes to discuss it with our neighbors in the pew. Whoah. Huge! I put my head down - not ready to chat about this. The conversations around me wandered away from the topic.<br /><br />I have no idea what it means... and I know it means so many things. What does it mean to me? Do I even believe it? (& how does it relate to last week's message about acceptance & <a href="http://out-of-the-attic.blogspot.com/2009/05/zucchini-onion.html">pruning by God</a>?)<br /><br />Walking home I remembered reading some encouraging and challenging ideas about being chosen by God in <a href="http://www.henrinouwen.org/">Henri Nouwen</a>'s <span style="font-style: italic;">Life of the Beloved</span>. I want to claim his words as my answer to the question... but really I'm still trying to understand & believe it.<br /><br />"Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the sacred voice that call us the 'Beloved.' Being the Beloved expresses the core truth of our existence." p. 28<br /><br />"Becoming the beloved is the great spiritual journey that we have to make." p. 32<br /><br />"First of all, you have to keep unmasking the world about you for what it is: manipulative, controlling, power-hungry and, in the long run, destructive. The world tells you many lies about who you are, and you simply have to remain realistic enough to reminder yourself of this." p. 49<br /><br />"Secondly, you have to keep looking for people and places where your truth is spoken and where you are reminded of your deepest identity as the chosen one. Yes, we must dare to opt consciously for our chosenness and not allow our emotion, feelings or passions to seduce us into self-rejection." p. 49-50<br /><br />"Thirdly, you have to celebrate your chosenness constantly. This means saying 'thank you' to God for having chosen you, and 'thank you' to all who reminded you of your chosenness. Gratitude is the most fruitful way of deepening your consciousness that you are not an 'accident' but a divine choice." p. 50<br /><br />"When we claim and constantly reclaim the truth of being the chosen ones, we soon discover within ourselves a deep desire to reveal to others their own chosenness. Instead of making us feel that we are better, more precious or valuable than others, our awareness of being chosen opens our eyes to the chosenness of others." p. 52-53<br /><br />"The characteristic of the blessed ones is that wherever they go, they always speak words of blessing. It is remarkable how easy it is to bless others, to speak good things to and about them, to call forth their beauty and truth, when you yourselves are in touch with your own blessedness. The blessed one always blesses." p. 67<br /><br /><span style="font-family:arial;"></span>And I think this is the link between last week's message & this week's:<br /><br />"Becoming the Beloved is pulling the truth revealed to me from above down into the ordinariness of what I am, in fact, thinking of, talking about an doing from hour to hour. ... When our deepest truth is that we are the Beloved and when our greatest joy and peace come from fully claiming that truth, it follows that this has to become visible and tangible in the ways that we eat and drink, talk and love, play and work." pp. 39-40<span style="font-family:arial;"></span><br /><br /><br />Nouwen, Henri. <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Life-Beloved-Spiritual-Living-Secular/dp/0824511840"><span style="font-style: italic;">Life of the beloved: Spiritual living in a secular world</span></a>. NY: Crossroads. 1993.Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-57896236260314481032009-04-08T22:49:00.000-07:002009-04-08T22:50:45.162-07:00my lenten challenge"But the idea that Jesus was deliberately handed over and abandoned by his Father to the fate of death is intolerable. When you think about it, what kind of Father is this? A sadist. Even Abraham drew back from killing his own son. This construal of the cross blames the Father for what in fact was done to Jesus by the history of human injustice. It schools people in patterns of thought that regard sadistic behavior as legitimate. When translated into spirituality, it encourages them to worship the executioner." p. 63<br /><br />I am really struggling with Easter this year. It's not a holiday that you can just skip, like Columbus Day. As the centerpiece of the Christian religion you have to deal with the biblical events and their meaning. But what do you have to work with if you reject the notion that a Father God had his Only Son killed for your sake? That story is immediately grisly. Guilt-inducing. Illogical, at least to contemporary thinking. & maybe not coherent with the rest of the Gospel.<br /><br />In the last couple of years I've encountered some new-to-me interpretations of scripture. There are other ways to understand atonement and, as in the quote above, the crucifixion. Unfortunately, I haven't found a community of believers that I can study and embody this stuff with. The churches I've visited either maintain the conventional interpretations or issue New Age teaching. Neither one sustains the depth and vision I'm seeking.<br /><br />So I'm trying to find my way this season. I'm still attending church services (I love our quirky little community). And then, often prompted by something in a sermon or hymn, I'm still exploring what else it may all mean - in books, in my journal, and in my heart. The discord between what I'm hearing in my faith community and what I'm hearing in my heart is drawing me to continue my exploration. Surely there is something else, something essentially different, that is still true and it calls me to continue.<br /><br /><br />Johnson, Elizabeth A. Quest for the Living God: Mapping frontiers in the theology of God. New York: Continuum. 2007Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-51677702574991335342009-03-06T22:13:00.000-08:002009-04-08T07:13:57.953-07:00rote & ritual"Still I miss Jewish ways. I miss the rhythms and routines that drew the sacred into the everyday. I miss Sabbaths on which I actually rested. I have even found that I miss the drudgery of keeping kosher. I miss the work these practices effected between me and God." p. vii<br /><br />"Your faith might come and go, but your practice ought not waver. (Indeed, Judaism suggests that the repeating of practice is the best way to ensure that a doubter's faith will return.)" p. ix<br /><br /><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:arial;"></span></span>For years I have tried and faltered and wished for "rhythms and routines that drew the sacred into the everyday." I want daily actions and seasonal traditions in order to honor the sacred that I know and experience. But I also want them to hold a place for what I have not experienced and yet hope to know.<br /><br />I think of these rituals and daily practices like a skeleton or a bowl. They bear witness that there is hot rich marrow to fill these bones, flesh and life to clothe them. There is something, however numinous, that this bowl is waiting to hold.<br /><br />By tending these containers I invite the Holy to me, into my life.<span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:arial;"></span></span><br /><br />Winner, Lauren. <span style="font-style: italic;">Mudhouse Sabbath</span>. Brewster, MA: Paraclete Press. 2003Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-8554583402591237722009-02-28T21:24:00.000-08:002009-02-28T22:32:03.538-08:00lord of the danceElizabeth A. Johnson in <span style="font-style: italic;">Quest for the Living God</span>, expanding on the analogy between perichoresis and the cognate word for choreography:<br /><br />"If God is dancing, why not step out to the contagious rhythms of salsa, merengue, calypso, swing, or reggae or to the intricate a-rhythmic patterns of modern dance? The point is, with the three circling around in a mutual, dynamic movement of love, God is not a static being but a plenitude of self-giving love, a saving mystery that overflows into the world of sin and death to heal, redeem, and liberate. The whole point of this history of God with the world is to bring the world back into the life of God's own communion, back into the divine dance of life." (p. 214)<br /><br />The word <span style="font-weight: bold;">perichoresis</span> first caught my attention while I was reading for my master's thesis. What a funny word! Broken into its parts it's: peri - around + choresis - dancing. I didn't entirely get it. It was something to do with the trinity, the communion of those aspects, and them giving to everything else. What has God "dancing around" got to do with any of that? But it certainly captures the imagination. I mean, imagine the trinity that way - not some dry theological fine point anymore, is it. I noted it in my <a href="http://out-of-the-attic.blogspot.com/2006/08/holy-vocab.html">blog</a> and kept on with my reading.<br /><br />So it's like running into a friend of a friend at my favorite take-out place to find that word again in another book that is significant to me. Maybe we'll get to know each other a little better this time.<br /><br />The word was embedded in a chapter devoted to the recall and revitalization of the trinity as an expression and understanding of an essentially different relationship with God made possible through Christ. A trinitarian description of God began as a vivid articulation that in addition to the God whose name is <span style="font-size:85%;">YHWH</span> and goes unspoken, there is also God as we know in the historical life of Jesus and God as we know in the ongoing presence of the Spirit. YHWH drew near to us, nearer than a burning bush or still small voice, by living with us as one of us, extending that solidarity to the point of death. That is a phenomenal gift. It continues with Jesus' resurrection and upon his return to Heaven we perceive the Holy Spirit which remains with us granting insight, supporting & prompting change in the world, offering comfort in the midst of this great work.<br /><br />Getting back to perichoresis, Johnson leads up to it with this description on the previous page, "The holy mystery of God is not a single monolith with a rigid nature, an undifferentiated whole, but a living fecundity of relational life that overflows to the world."<br /><br />And now I start to get it. There is a Mystery. We learn to let it be Mystery and simultaneously we try to articulate what we have observed and experienced of it. We say, "it is a Transcendent Other, and an Historical Man, and an Immanent Companion." We say anything about it at all because we want to honor it (along with our less flattering motives). We believe, and the evidence of these three ways of meeting the Mystery fosters that belief, that it wants to know and be known, love and be loved, by us.<br /><br /><br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Johnson, Elizabeth A. <span style="font-style: italic;">Quest for the Living God: Mapping frontiers in the theology of God</span>. New York: Continuum. 2007</span>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-31710309714625876262009-01-11T13:59:00.000-08:002009-02-08T22:23:33.030-08:00of the waters"And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters."<br /><br />Genesis 1:2 King James Version<br /><br />They say that humans are 78% water. Imagine that we're made of the very same water of those primordial days. The Spirit of God moved upon the face of us then and so moves within us now. Providing good company, in darkness and in light.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">I don't usually read the book of Genesis but this was read to us on Sunday morning and it's remained with me. You can read a little more about what came to me on Sunday at this posting:</span> <b>ִ </b><a href="http://out-of-the-attic.blogspot.com/2009/01/serendipity-spirit.html"><b>עִמָּנוּאֵל</b></a><span style="font-style: italic;"></span>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-77721453338773131522009-01-08T21:44:00.000-08:002009-01-10T21:43:05.410-08:00quest for the living church"The good news treasured by Christian faith proclaims that this ineffable horizon graciously approaches us and bids us approach, enfolding us in an ultimate and radical love." p. 41<br /><br />"Such loving presence is what theology calls grace." p. 41<br /><br />"First and last the church is the sacramental presence of the promise of God to the world, a community that despite its sinfulness signals to the whole world that God's self-gift is continuously offered to all." p. 43<br /><br />I want to believe, experience, and behave as a Christian, in the best sense of the word. Since I was a child I have wrestled with my faith and with Christian identity. I devour books that resonate with my sense of what Christianity is at the core and can be in the world. I hold onto companions who share this quest for a radical faith. I want to be challenged beyond awakening into living, daily and in relationship, this faith. And I am amateur. I need teachers and companions in this journey.<br /><a style="font-style: italic;" href="http://www.amazon.com/Quest-Living-God-Frontiers-Theology/dp/0826417701/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1231648606&sr=8-1"><br />Quest for the Living God</a> is one of those books. It was suggested to me by my friend the Bright Reverend A. In it, I discovered the theologian Karl Rahner, who presented the ideas above in response to the pervasive atheism of the 20th century. Reading this book with A prompted me to find a faith community and I am impressed with our pastor and congregation. Our community convinces me, challenges me, and moves me deeper into a life of faith.<br /><br /><br />Johnson, Elizabeth A. <span style="font-style: italic;">Quest for the Living God: Mapping frontiers in the theology of God</span>. New York: Continuum. 2007<br /><span style="font-size:85%;"><br />You can expect more quotes from this book. It really is that good.<br />The Bright Reverend A isn't actually ordained yet but I am certain that she will be called & supported in it when the time is right. She shines just as bright regardless.<br /></span>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-3863671338093705742008-09-20T00:17:00.000-07:002008-09-20T00:50:13.214-07:00befriending"Meditation practice isn't about trying to throw ourselves away and become something better. It's about befriending who we are already."<div><br /></div><div>I read this last night and it caught me. My journal is full of notes-to-self and to-do lists that chart a course away from who I am today in search of some other, better, holier-than-I-am, more successful, more creative, more everything me. But this quote invites me to accept an inconsistent, imperfect, petty, wacky, stressed out self. Love her, as is, today.</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm approaching meditation in an effort to heal my body. Eve, the nurse practitioner who is coaching me through my postpartum rehabilitation, recommended two books that she thought may teach me how to relax. Was it clear to her that healing my body (I am So Frustrated with my broken body) required another kind of healing within? I'm grateful to her for the suggestion. It was beyond my imagination but now it feels obvious and real.</div><div><br /></div><div>Thank you.</div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Chodron, Pema. C</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">omfortable with uncertainty: 108 teachings</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">. Boston: Shambhala. 2002. p. 11.</span></div>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-8784165002369106982008-08-23T20:06:00.000-07:002008-08-24T07:55:19.289-07:00for Brova & his mother<div style="text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Mary's Song at the Cross<br /><br /></div>I am Miriam<br />my name means bitterness<br />and I will mourn<br />mourn and not be comforted<br />for the Lord God has dealt bitterly<br />with his handmaiden<br /><br />Once I said yes<br />be it unto me according to your will<br />I am Miriam<br />my name means rebellion<br />and now I say no<br />the holy one will not win<br />what the holy one wills<br />he shall not have<br /><br />For I am am the mother<br />and I say my son shall sleep<br />sleep in my womb<br />sleep until he rises<br />rises with the sun<br /><br />I am Miriam<br />my name means bitter rebellion<br />the angels are round about me<br />And you shall not have him<br />terrible one, you shall not<br />you shall not have<br />my son.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">Brova was his mother's only child, a son, and she was a single mother. She lived for him. She saw him into his early manhood - and he was precious.<br /><br />Brova worked as an intern at the company where I am an admin. He was bright, funny, and kind. He left to study civil engineering at one of the top programs in the country. All of us who worked with him liked him, laughed with him, and wished him well. We knew success was his.<br /><br />Brova died last weekend in a swimming accident. It doesn't make sense to anyone who knew him. It doesn't make sense to any mother who loves her son. It certainly doesn't make any sense to me. I resist it, and deny it, and refuse it.<br /><br />This quote is posted in memory of Brova, in sympathy with his mother, and in defense of my own jealous love for my son.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Mary's Song taken from Elizabeth Cunningham. The Passion of Mary Magdalene. Rhinebeck, NY: Monkfish Book Publishing Company. 2006.</span><span style=";font-family:times new roman;font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-size:85%;"></span></span><span style="font-family:arial;"><span style="font-size:85%;"><br /></span></span></div></div>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-75957269702908807492008-08-12T22:08:00.001-07:002008-08-23T20:41:07.186-07:00ani knows"Love is all over the place,<br /> there is nothing wrong with your face"<br /><br />In the same vein as the previous post - this line is taken from "Present/Infant," a song on Ani DiFranco's upcoming album <span style="font-style: italic;">Red Letter Year</span>. The song shares the story of Ani's own struggle with self-image, self-hatred, and the bright challenging mirror her baby holds up to her.<br /><br />All the love we feel for our babies, all the love we want them to know and have for themselves, they teach us to extend to ourselves.Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6782581679173021879.post-4527873476134349822008-08-11T22:13:00.000-07:002008-08-12T22:04:03.448-07:00like a woman's"I like mine, both of them, and they don't match."<br /><br />After you have a baby everything changes.<br /><br />One morning, a few weeks ago, my husband was taking our son to his six month check-up. Still in my pajamas, I dashed out of our apartment to catch up with them and hand off the baby's new insurance card. While jogging across the street, in front of a line of cars stopped for the light, during rush hour traffic, my arms instantly pulled up against my chest in a reflex of protection and, frankly, support. It seems that "the girls" don't have the same resilience that they once did.<br /><br />I feel like an adolescent wading through puberty. My body is permanently altered, unfamiliar, and uniquely my own. I am learning to love, again, the skin I'm in.<br /><span style="font-size:85%;"><br /><br /><span>quote from </span><span style="font-style: italic;">Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom, </span>first edition paperback, page not known.</span>Jennihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01802141394505833298noreply@blogger.com0